Good things come to those who wait!

I certainly hope the subject line is true. My treatment went from fast forward to a slow rewind over these past 30 days, but the finish line is finally near!! With all I have going on in my life outside of my treatment, these days should be flying by....but they're not. I'm not fixated on my cancer, but very focused on the plan in front of me. I have to laugh when my work colleagues, where I've picked up significant new responsibilities in the past week, remind me to center my attention on my health. I am laser-focused. While our ski season is over, my new responsibilities with Ski Patrol require continued work to prepare for the next season, not to mention some teaching duties in our off-season first aid class. So with all of this book-ended around my treatment, why do the days seem to be mired in quicksand??

"Good things come to those who wait" is a proverb derived from a bible quote that seems to have fallen out of favor with the "instant gratification" crowd (must confess to be a card- carrying member, unfortunately). This was the slogan for ad campaigns from Guinness and Heinz ketchup, and those are worth the wait for sure. But I have a hard time comparing the wait on those products to the wait I'm dealing with regarding my surgery. It's not anxiety, as some have suggested, it's the challenge of slowing the mind and body of a classic type-A personality to accept that time is not a personal choice. Patience truly is a virtue, and I would say a skill I'm still working on perfecting.

Yesterday I met with my anesthesiology team at City of Hope for my last consultation before surgery next Friday, April 26th (for those of you keeping score). I was informed that this particular type of surgery is TEN hours long. I had in my notes 4.5 - 5 from an early consultation, so I wasn't prepared to hear this. In true type-A style, I contacted my surgeon from the consultation room to get his explanation, assuming something had changed, there were complications I wasn't being told or he needs to leave mid-surgery for a golf tournament up the street. Answers...needed answers quick. Apparently, this is SOP for this procedure, so he told me to chill - afterall, I'd just be laying there asleep and he would be the one doing the extra 5 hours of work!! Of all the nerve!

Headed out for a good long bike ride this morning, feeding tube and all, and will remind myself that it will be a while before I'm back on these trails again. So I'll take it all in today and remind myself how lucky I am to be in this position - just one week away from being healthy again (not counting the endless recovery period, or course!!). I'll post again before surgery with all the up-to-the-minute details to keep this all straight. Thanks again for all of your continued positive thoughts and prayers - they have really made the difference in my treatment. The doctors are good....but you have been great!!